Listening

Listening. 

Listening is a very powerful tool and a skill that unfortunately is not very well utilized in today's society.  I have recently listening to a TED talk by Julian Treasure discussing 5 ways to listen better.  

Listening is a skill that is actually highly valued in the workplace.  It's classed as a soft skill.  Listening within a work context is the process by which you can gain understanding of the needs, demands and preferences through interaction.

All of us need to learn to listen.  Being better at listening helps improve every aspect of our lives including productivity as well as being able to persuade, influence and negotiate. 

How well we listen has a major impact on various aspects of life especially job effectiveness and has a major impact on the quality of relationships with other people.  

We listen to obtain Information

We listen to Understand

We listen for enjoyment 

We listen to learn     

As humans, we all have a universal need to feel heard and to be understood.  

Many people are quite self-centered in their conversation, or perhaps I should say in their monologue, they love to hear themselves talk, rarely ask questions and when they finally allow the other person to speak they quickly bring it right back to themselves.

In 2008, after a series of failed hearing tests, I was fitted with digital hearing aids in both ears for bilateral sensorineural hearing loss which is hearing loss deep inside my inner ear which was caused by viral illness.  When I first sat in our garden of our previous home, I could not believe the noise I could hear of traffic, birds and even small noises inside the house.  Noises that I could never hear previously.  Although nice, I had headache from so much noise. 

Hearing is an auditory/physiological process. There’s so much to learn from others.  Everybody has a story.  We just need to listen. 

I have read in many papers that when people feel understood, they’re less likely to get defensive and argumentative (in a work setting is very valuable).  As humans, our visceral need is to feel held with words, rather than to receive solutions.

I believe that when I get the space and understanding I need, I can usually come to my own answers. And if not, there’s always time for me to brainstorm for possible solutions.

With the simple act of listening, you can reveal so much to someone else. What if we all just listened more to each other?