Smartphones & Social Media

Looking around everyone has a form of smartphone.  Today, my sister and I watched a couple sat down with their son for Sunday Lunch, they were both on their phones and their son was just left sat staring into space.

There is rarely a time when my partner doesn't have her phone with her,  near her or at the very least, in a place she could quickly grab it.

I used to be guilty if we took a walk together or with Lindo, I would have mine ready to take a photo or catch the next video of Lindo.  

Even when we go to bed, my wife will often read on her phone, both our smartphones infact will be on each bedside table, lying between us like Lindo did as a small puppy, who’d snuggled in for the night and ruined any chance of intimacy.

I don't believe that people realise how bad smartphones are for their relationships.  I do not think I even realized it at the time to be honest.  In hindsight, I can see that most of the time, my wife retreated into her phone and I was fully absorbed by mine.  Looking around us, there isn't anything strange or excessive about our behavior.  Friends and couples around us are also interacting with each other from beyond their screens, and they seem perfectly happy, at least according to their Instagram and Facebook posts.

I think after a while, you begin to loose that sense of personal connection with each other, that special feeling you get when you understand each other without having to even say a word or even the fulfillment of being alone together and feeling like you’re the only two people in the world. 

Going back to the couple today at lunchtime, why do they prefer to check Facebook and play Candy Crush than to sit and talk?

I believe that Smartphones and the instant connection to social media they give has had a massive effect on communication.  You only have to look at what happens when you talk to a friend or relative and they are looking down and using their phone.  People seem to prefer to instant message each other instead of calling each other or even speak to each other face to face, in doing so you end up missing facial gestures, eye contact, tone, body language, and the emotions driving contact.  

When you stand and watch teenagers, Conversation seems to be a chore that consists of generic, predetermined questions and equally humdrum answers, they prefer to have their heads stuck in their mobile phone.

I try to be more aware of how I use my smartphone and try to be more aware of how people around me use theirs.  I know we don't use our phones now as much as the average couple.  We do it because occasionally like in the early days we stay up talking and laughing. We go on a long walk with Lindo and now leave our phones at home, I take a normal camera to capture those important moments. 

Put your phones down and get back in touch with the feelings that no amount of time on social media can come close too.