What makes me Happy?
What makes me happy?
Currently my wife, my mini labradoodle Lindo and my family.
What makes society happy?
We are lead to be it is opportunity, money and lifestyle.
My mum lived and slept in one room sharing a bed with her 2 older sisters while her mum worked for hours at the local hospital as a nurse to provide for them. My father had a completely different up bringing and once his mother passed away he seemed to survive on weetabix.
My parents ensured growing up that we had everything as well as the love and support to become whoever we wanted too. If we shared a bed when I was little it was because the three of us were playing and talking, it wasn't because we had no other option.
Technology available to me today means my life is different from my parents and of course my grandparents. A so called improved society, means that our lives have been transformed. Even as a young girl, I had choices. I can live wherever I want, marry who I want and travel whenever and wherever I wish too. So many opportunities.
With the power of technology and the internet I can talk to people thousands of miles away at anytime of the day.
Does all of this make me happy?
No, it doesn't.
I am not very good at making decisions, with too much choice I become severely restless. You buy a smartphone and next month a new one comes out, you buy a new car and 6mths later the next model is out, it seems society has created a lifestyle of always wanting something better. In other posts, I have touched on thinking that someone elsewhere is having a better time than we are here. I believe it is possible that we have made ourselves miserable by constantly thinking about the unknown in an endless quest to find happiness.
I have difficulties sleeping and often I lie awake at night torturing myself over what I should do next, wondering if but staying put in certain situations, I am missing out on something better. I feel, I am wasting my life if I am not doing something more important.
I remember continually hearing “The World is your Oyster” from a very young age, is it? I think this just adds pressure, makes everything feel urgent and that I/we should be doing something great right now or we are actually just a complete failure.
What happens if I just want a job local to home and want to spend my weekends with my wife and dog and only ever holiday in the Lakes? Does that make me unadventurous, boring and unsuccessful?
I don't care about the latest model telephone, the latest trainers or going on holiday to the body retreat in St Lucia. I count my blessings for what I have, I cannot be sucked into this cycle of unhappiness bough on by focusing on what I don't have that I feel I should. This focus on what we don't have must make people so miserable and if they are constantly focusing on what they don't have, are they ever looking at what they already have?
I know plenty of people that move every year to find the perfect road and the perfect home in order to be happy. Someone I work with jumps from one job to the next, never fully committing to anything.
They are no happier than me. They are suffering from grass is greener syndrome, how will they ever be happy?
My grandfather used to tell me “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans" and he was so right, I think he pinched this of somebody to be honest!
I have said before that becoming poorly back in 2010 not only changed my life but put me in certain paths and made me examine every feeling and emotion even if I didn't want too. I had forgotten often before 2010 that the whole point of being happy means we have peace of mind.
Essentially, it’s being happy no matter where you are in the world, or what you’re doing, or whom you’re with. Spending countless time in Kings speaking to top Neuropsychologists to help me accept being ill means that I have also learnt plenty about life and I appreciate my life now, I am present.
Don’t get me wrong, opportunity is a marvelous thing, but the simple life is where I have found peace.
I embrace everything that comes along. I still go out and see the world and enjoy everything that life offers me.
Happiness to me isn’t about where I live or what job I have. It isn’t about being on an impossible mission to do everything, see everywhere, and accomplish everything I have ever read about.
Since my chest line was fitted, I have let go of the past, I don't think about the future, I attempt to concentrate on today, I deal with each day as it comes which actually was the central reason behind this blog.
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