Healing 02/07/2017
My chest line is healing well, it has started to cuff and the lumens are beginning to settle themselves into a normal everyday place. I am learning more about how I can move and what I can do everyday, I know if I raise my right arm above shoulder height at the moment it still hurts and lifting a basket of washing really is my limit.
Blood has appeared in the lines because I fell asleep on my front a couple of afternoons ago and the weight pushing down on my chest forced blood into the clear newly flushed lines.
I am still struggling to sleep on my back so have ordered myself a V Shape Pillow, I recently put an airmax silentnight topper onto the bed and got some airmax pillows to make my back feel comfortable but years of naturally sleeping on my front mean I am still struggling.
Mentally I feel a little down, I am struggling to accept that this line is permanent, I am still battling with knowing I won't play golf again for the foreseeable future, a renewed love of reading and a new hobby of photography hopefully in time will help but currently just don't cut it.
I really struggle with people staring at my chest, I am used to it from the male sex because I am fairly large chested but currently the staring is curiosity because over the top of my vest you can visibly see the biopatch and the dressing.
Once the stitches are out hopefully I will feel more settled (according to the hospital I will), I hope so because currently I feel extremely self conscious.

Elliott just said "Elliott the red one and beau the blue one"!!
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